Police Stories Gifts

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

'Doesn't ring any bells...'

'Freeze!' (policeman to snowman)

Why genies make lousy criminals: "I wish the police were here!!"

'You know you are having a senior moment when you have to explain that you were speeding because you had to get to where you were going before you forgot where you were going.'

'Hey, I think that's him: alligator riding motorcycle, wearing goggles and a bandana - hold it - there's no bandana.'

'I don't think that Magritte chappie has really got what it takes to be a police artist.'

'Eddy Penguin? I'm not sure, officer... Can you desctibe him?'

'Dat was jus' a warnin', Detective Jones. Get off da Bozo case!'

Mugger around the corner from a group of policemen.

Get back, Copper! Or the marrow gets it

'Can you see the man who assaulted you in the supermarket?'

'Looks like another cereal killing.'

Who shot the arrow?

Good news - we've found your car.

"It's a disaster Sir: most new recruits suffer from some kind of ADHD or phone addiction and can't follow a trail for more than 30 seconds..."

'I thought I told you to wait in the car.'

'He arrested two kids yesterday. One for drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. He charged one and let the other off!'

Police borrows a tricycle to catch a bank robber.

"Lets take a cab. I can afford it."

"...And don't try to make a run for it!"

"Okay, but before I tell you who broke the window I'll have to check you're not wearing a wire."

"Tell me what you're seeing, detective."

"You're not getting anything out me unless you pinch really hard with your thumb and forefinger then pull."

Cherub arrested.

'I didn't get the license number, but the driver was blonde, about a 42 bust, no bra, in a see-through blouse.'

"Badges? We don't have to show you no stinkin' badges!"

Crooks

"So then how do you explain trigonometry, tough guy!"

"I know it's hard. We all look exactly the same to me, too."

"Whom shall I say is arresting?"

Might Versus Right.

Robber ends up on police car.

'We know you're in there Bannerwitz! Now open the dam door!!'

"They're gaining on us - start throwing the doughnuts."