Police Case Keen Gifts

"Ow! Don't smush so hard, meatball!"

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

"He was WOK-ing in a winter wonderland."

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

'Then my brother said he'd like to bury the hatchet...'

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

"He did it!"

Police man stands guard at a murder scene in Egyptology department of a museum.

Bribery and Corruption.

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

Newton's Law and Order.

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."

CSI Wonderland. (Photographer takes a picture of a cracked Humpty Dumpty. Investigators collect evidence from the scene.)

'...and as a consequence, you lot all redundant. I'm not making it up.'

Bureau of Missing Persons

"Oh, my, I can tell—everybody in there has read Barbara Tuchman."

'We have a positive ID on the spacecraft, Mr. Ferguson. Now, if you can identify the one who abducted you, we won't keep you any longer!'

"I'm home, with all my DNA."

CSI Fridays

'I'm going to ask you one more time; who left a hot mug on this table?'

Financial Corruption

'The close Ops surveillance people have just sent these photo's over and we now strongly suspect that Jimmy the Greek is onto us...'

"Let me through... I’m an armchair detective!"

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

'Sure we've got a lot of anger. We also got a lot cement.'

Ski Surfing

"We think we've found the murder weapon Sir"

'Don't you people ever take a pulse? ! '

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

'Have you found a precedent? Yes, you did the same crime in 1974.'