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"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

'I can enjoy an 'unfinished novel', but this will be the last time I'll buy an 'UNSTARTED novel'...'

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

The Art Student.

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

"A little help, please."

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"Here's one: 'Youth Frisbee Camp', from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Tuesdays." "Naw... Go back to that first one, for 'early chewers', wasn't that one a sleep-over camp?"

Sunbathing in the park

To be honest, I'd just as soon as lay in the yard, but he so looks forward to it.

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

"I'm waiting for my imagination to run riot."

"I made the mistake of telling him that the world is his canvas."

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Excuse me Ma'am, do you mind if I smoke?'

Dogs Playing Poker in the Park

'It's not as easy as you think - saddle sores, bursitis in the shoulder, pigeons...'

'...your hindsight on this project was far more accurate than his foresight.'

"I just need help getting started. A little seed money."

High School Schedule

"I feel that I have at least one more unpublished novel in me."

"I'm ready for summer vacation! A good book takes you where you've never been!"

Andre Gide.

'Mother?'

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

'I told you not to bark at geese!'

"I meant the dog!"

'No, no, no. You guys are way off! This isn't even the cat. You guys are on the dog.'

Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.

'I think you've put that in the wrong place.'

"The script is flimsy, the action scenes implausible and the plot would insult the intelligence of a three year old."

"I thought they introduced the witch a little late."

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"