Plot Analyst T-Shirts

'The only thing that made sense was the violence.'

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

"I'm waiting for my imagination to run riot."

"I feel that I have at least one more unpublished novel in me."

"I'm ready for summer vacation! A good book takes you where you've never been!"

Andre Gide.

'A temporary solution would be to white out this part of the chart.'

Business Outlook

"The script is flimsy, the action scenes implausible and the plot would insult the intelligence of a three year old."

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

"I thought they introduced the witch a little late."

'Here, here and here the copier was jammed...'

'And this is the day we put too much coffee in the cappuccino machine.'

Ted knew he had a bestseller. Now all he had to do was fill the middle bits in.

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

'This is where we hired Felder. All those in favor of going back in time and not hiring Felder...'

10 commandments

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

After months of writer's block, the great man's biographer finally decides how to end the book.

"We need a plot twist."

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"It was around here we felt the force of el nino."

"Sorry, but your personal life story just isn't very original."

"Better than Chekhov"

Wearing all black

"And this is where, to use a technical term, 'things went to shit.'"

He's celebrating finishing the last page of his novel...now he only has the other 468 to write.

Soap Opera

"Well, I've been struggling to write a book about my struggle to write a book..."