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Soap Opera

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

'A temporary solution would be to white out this part of the chart.'

Business Outlook

'Play any other position besides Monday morning quarterback?'

"Hello darling, what do you do for a living?"

"Agenda item 14 C, does anyone have any idea what happened in Game of Thrones?"

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

"I thought they introduced the witch a little late."

Armstrong, the new Ybox game console comes out next week. I've got to get in line at Computer Villa. Nope. You are callous and inhumane. Fortunately, I have a backup plan. Computer Villa sale! If anyone cuts, chew their nose off.

'Here, here and here the copier was jammed...'

'And this is the day we put too much coffee in the cappuccino machine.'

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

'This is where we hired Felder. All those in favor of going back in time and not hiring Felder...'

'The only thing that made sense was the violence.'

"It was around here we felt the force of el nino."

"And this is where, to use a technical term, 'things went to shit.'"

Andrew Marr

'She said to read between the lines to infer the answer, but it's hard to see in between them because they're so close together.'

'Just remember. . . work harder, work smarter and more importantly, you may have to work for less.'

Sport and Politics section of the newspaper exploding.

"What can I get you?" "An explanation for that dumb reason why Batman and Superman stopped fighting at the end of Batman v Superman." "Would you like that spoiler-filled or spoiler-free?" "Spoiler-filled would be lovely, please." "Ok. Batman did not stop fighting Superman just because both of their moms were named 'Martha.'" "'Martha' was not just a person. In Batman’s nightmares, 'Martha' had come to represent all that was good about him." "When Superman whispered 'Martha,' it did t

"Numerous complaints have led school officials to investigate this popular teacher for encouraging students to pursue degrees in the humanities."

"I don't have the specifics yet, but my protractor shows your portfolio is up 8 degrees."

Mystery Writer's Book Signing...Tell the Author How You Could Have COme Up With A Better Ending, 4-6pm.

'And their financial E.K.G. shows that they are in excellent health.'

'Baby and Child Care Guidelines'

Movies made for under eight million dollars.

All Eggs in One Basket world headquarters

"Is there no escape from escapism?"

"We must be rich... because we're getting richer."