Playful Pupper Gifts

"How 'bout a goodnight sniff?"

"Say something like 'Bow-wow' or 'Arf-arf' and you'll really break them up."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

'I don't care if it's hot, I won't go in the water!'

'Super Dog'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

Pet Pony

'Click it or ticket.'

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

K9 Literati.

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

"It's just until he gets over his laryngitis."

Love is... when your puppy licks you face without knowing where it's been.

Headshot of perky dog.

'Good book?'

'Okay, okay! You can have a lick of my sucker.'

Dalmation with soccer ball: Soccer Hound.

Child in toy car being pulled by a dog

"When I said, 'Give him a chance-best two out of three,' I was talking to the dog."

"I lick my fur and then rub against their legs. They think I'm being affectionate, but I'm actually just wiping cat spit on them."

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

Puppy and Kitten.

Playing with the dog with a boomerang.

A girl with a dog and balloons

'If we build it, they will come.'

'Can't you just hand me a plastic worm?!'

'Good boy. That's better than the others, but still too long. For playing fetch, I prefer a shorter stick, shaped like that, without bark or moss, and not quite as heavy.'