Playful Pessimist Gifts

"First they make you button your own shirt, then they make you tie your own shoes...you gotta ask yourself ? where's this all heading?"

The 'Stroke' of Midnight

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

The End is Near art gallery opening.

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

'I find it difficult not to entertain the occasional negative thought.'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

The Dungeon

Misfortune cookies

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

Glass Half Empty and Glass Half Full.

"Room for bigger presents!"

Abstract art proves that things can be as bad as they look.

'There was a mild outbreak of optimism all over the world today, but it's not expected to last.'

Doomsdayers recycle pamphlets in case they are wrong.

This will be a banner day for you!

"If at first you don't succeed blame somebody."

'Look at that lunatic...'

"The nice thing about being a fruit fly is you only have to listen to one news cycle."

"If I was you...I wouldn't be worried about the future..."

"Is this worse? Or is this worse?"

'I tend to look on the negative side of things. Do you guys do rose coloured glasses'

"This feels like the start of something that will eventually break one of our hearts."

A giant squid gets "Life Sucks" tattooed on its tentacles.

'Do we have to go through this every year Henman says he can win Wimbledon?'

The split end is near.

"Well, it's a change of scenery."

"Breakfast is my favorite meal because the day hasn't been ruined yet."