Playful Pairing Lover Gifts

"Now, let's try a Waltz. Don't worry about me though, I'm wearing safety boots..."

Mixed Doubles.

Holding hands

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

Advanced footsie

Boy and his dog

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

Your spirit animal is a balloon poodle? My spirit animal is a balloon poodle!

Kiddies Menu for Witches

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

'You may now kick the bride.'

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

Love.

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

Puppy Love

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

"Milk does a body good but champagne does it better!"

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

"I love the way these safari trips bring out the animal in you, darling."

'Henry, cut that out.'

Consenting Adults.

You are simply the Greatest

"I'm not so sure I can handle this."

"I know you're a cat person, but do you have to knock things off the table when we're out?"

"They were all out of rings, so I got you a watch."

"What is it about a tee shirt cannon that says 'foreplay' to you?"

Tunnel of Love.

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

'So this is what you do while I'm away,'