Playful Pairing Lover Gifts

"Now, let's try a Waltz. Don't worry about me though, I'm wearing safety boots..."

Mixed Doubles.

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

Holding hands

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

Boy and his dog

Kiddies Menu for Witches

Advanced footsie

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

'You may now kick the bride.'

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

Love.

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

"Milk does a body good but champagne does it better!"

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

Puppy Love

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

"I love the way these safari trips bring out the animal in you, darling."

"I'm not so sure I can handle this."

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

You are simply the Greatest

Milton wonders if it would be possible to substitute scotch and sex for tea and sympathy.

"What is it about a tee shirt cannon that says 'foreplay' to you?"

"They were all out of rings, so I got you a watch."

"I know you're a cat person, but do you have to knock things off the table when we're out?"

Consenting Adults.

'Henry, cut that out.'

'So this is what you do while I'm away,'

"This will look great on our bedroom wall."