Playful Couple Gifts

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

'Well if you're going to play footsie with Roy Keane, what do you expect?'

"Oooh! I never knew your butt could move like that, honey!"

"When I'm with you, Ted, I feel dirty."

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

'I knew I shouldn't have brought you along. I haven't had a hit all day.'

'You may now kick the bride.'

'Doc says I'm in ship-shape.'

Lady to beat up husband: 'Wasn't that nice that my self-defense class signed your cast?'

"Warm and rich, fresh and bright, with depth and intensity. Not the wine, you."

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

Mixed Doubles.

"I said I'd give you the world, didn't I?"

'I'm telling you Fred, this can of silver paint is going to improve your love-life!...'

Holding hands

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

'The kids were so sweet...'

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

Your spirit animal is a balloon poodle? My spirit animal is a balloon poodle!

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

Advanced footsie

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

true love.

Rude Snowpeople

"See what happens when you go swimming after eating!"

Love.

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

'Shuck me.'