Playful Detectives T-Shirts

A boy acting suspiciously

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

"What are you in for?"

'Fancy coming on a man hunt?'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

"Now calm down Ma'am. If you want to report a murder I'll patch you through to Detective Malone in homicide. This is Sergeant Flanagan....Insecticide!"

"We think we've found the murder weapon Sir"

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

"TV violence made him do it. Says he'll name shows if we drop the charges."

Excessive Paperwork

Violence on TV.

'You're free to go. Another suspect matching the description of having big ears and a trunk has just been arrested for the circus stampede.'

'I am unable to find the words to respond to that.'

"This is too hard, but I'd recognize him on his own."

'So now you sniff out drugs. That's it, no more TV cop shows.'

"Hmmm...this'll be a tough one..."

Murdered man spells out his murderer in alphabet soup.

Serious Crime Squad, Light-Hearted Crime Squad, Happy As Larry Crime Squad.

'Good afternoon madam, we're Federal Bear Investigators. We believe a miss Goldilocks lives here?'

"You're not leaving until we know everything."

"So, you've got butterflies in your stomach, a bug in your ear and a bee in your bonnet. Any other complaints?"

"Hey - didn't I see you on TV last night?"

'Did you see who pushed you?'

'He died of too much money.'

'I don't think there's anyone home...Or am I just being naive?...'

'Just move along...Nothing core to see here.'

'I gather this is your first sting operation.'