Platitude Skeptic Gifts

Live, Love, Laugh, Loathe.

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

You complete me!

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

10 Commandments in the Supreme Court (USA)

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

A Truism's Journey

Progress?

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

"But, Jesus - you can't become an atheist."

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

"We’re having privacy concerns with your omniscience."

'It may look that way... But actually, I'm an atheist

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

"and what are you giving up for lent, Reverend?" "Religion"

'Do I ever wonder about a higher power? No, I wonder what's on TV.'

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

House of Wishful Thinking

'This one contains the commandments that will make people ENJOY life! Ha ha, just kidding.'

Actual Results May Vary

'I want to lose weight, Doctor.' - 'Eat less, then.' - 'I need it to be more complicated than that.' - 'Why?' - 'How can I justify failing if it's that simple, eh?!' - 'Gah. He's breaking me...' -

"I lied in my ad. I hate Wallace Stevens."

'You've convinced me. I'm becoming an atheist.'

'Jesus? Jesus who?'

"And Lord, let not thy laws apply to me, your loyal servant, but only to those miserable sinners whose souls we endeavor to save when it suits us."

'So it wasn't b*****t after all.'

"We also stock non-alcoholic wine" "Why?"