Plate Size Ponderer T-Shirts

"Quick qustion about your pizzas - do they come on a big enough plate?"

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

Idle parts

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

"... and come out fighting, boys."

"I've learned a lot in sixty-three years. But, unfortunately, almost all of it is about aluminum."

"Enough helium makes laughing gas."

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'How would you like your steak, sir?' - 'Big.'

Sensitivity Training For Bulls.

Fruits and vegetables

Sitting down

"Shouldn't we hold off an artificial intelligence until we figure out actual intelligence?"

'Mom, it's doing it again'

Hmmm... what's my real purpose? Why am I here? - 'Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me! Let me guess!' - 'Go on, then.' - 'Is your life a homage mediocrity?' - 'Ouch.' - 'Quizzes are fun! Ask me more!' -

Man confusing man using statistics.

"I feel bad about eating them...but they're so yummy."

Brownie Size/Okay to Eat

The Dinner Builiding

'Life's a swamp and then you croak.'

'It comes to something when the state of the pound is such that we HOPE to find lots of foreign coins!'

Stupendousize

The virtual vanity mirror.

Frank and Ernie's Seafood Grotto. I'll have the "seafood platter". Certainly, sir -- small, medium, or barge?

The Why-Can't-This-Event-Be-In-Miles-Like-Other-Sports-In-This-Country 10K

"Ed! Help me with this puzzle. I can’t get any pieces to fit." "Put on your glasses, Louise. These are corn chips."