Plastic Surgery Pun Enthusiast Gifts

"Plastic surgery saved my budget. I cut a few credit cards in half."

'You do Botox?'

'Now that's what I call rejection.'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'The donor for your face transplant was a Mr. Bonzo.'

'We've GOT to get the bullet out,,,'

"If this isn't successful, the next one is on us."

"Let's just start cutting and see what happens."

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

"Good?"

'And that's the simplest way to surgically remove a 'mole' from the patient!'

"The I.R.S. can't hurt him anymore."

Patients with HMO dread anesthesia.

"All these years I put my nose to the grindstone. Now I need a nose job!"

Cosmetic pouches.

'Voila!! No more wrinkles!!'

"Sorry, Bob, those are the rules– you drop the kidney, you give them yours."

"Why do I always get the stupid wobbly table?"

"Mr Brown. Are you in for a triple bypass or an ingrown toenail?"

"Relax! He's in good hands!!"

'I went under the knife. Do you like?'

"I ran out of plastic skin, so I grafted on her credit cards!"

"Sorry Mr. Parkinson, but I've left some rubber gloves inside you. I need to open you up to retrieve them."

'I think you've reached the mandatory retirement number of oopses.'

"Which is it today doctor, - Back, Beatles, or Backstreet Boys?"

"He did it again. Slipped out and replaced himself with a bunch of lumpy pillows."

"Most drug lords evade capture by making smarter choices with plastic surgery."

Next! (liposuction specialist)

Old man - 'Who are you?' Glamorous lady - 'Your wife for 57 years back from plastic surgery!'