Plastic Surgery Aficionados Pillows

Cosmetic pouches.

'I went under the knife. Do you like?'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"Get another opinion if you wish, Mr. Von Flip...But I'm confident it will still come up ' heads - we operate.'"

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

'Let's cut right through to the heart of the matter.'

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

'You do Botox?'

Body Building

'Anaesthetic ok?' - 'Yes, ten double scotches from the pub up the road.'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

Surgery has sign on wall saying 'To Err is Human.'

A football game appears on the operating theatres monitor instead of the patients heartbeat.

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

Jumble Sale

'Just remember, you're not alone - I'm scared to death, too.'

Anatomy.

'If you want them balanced, it'll be an extra 250 dollars.'

"I'm Dr. Fenton. I'll be performing your microsurgery today."

The Big Book of Really Hard Surgery

'Recent studies have demonstrated that what we believed were ritual sacrifices to Gods, were unsuccessful attempts to do breast implant surgeries."'

Several of the med students had been cheerleaders when they were undergrads.

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

'She had a boob job halfway through the sitting!'

"Well, we saved this attorney. Some poacher shot him and removed his highly-prized fin."

"All these years I put my nose to the grindstone. Now I need a nose job!"

He really puts his heart into it!

'Whew! Five surgeries in one day! Well, let's try to make this last one end on a happy note!'

Operating room. 3 days without an accident.

'Thanks for allowing these high school students to watch your surgery. Check it out on YouTube!'

Neuro Surgery. Staff only. Sorry, that took longer than I expected --- He has a lot of nerve!

'I knew there was another book in him!'

'Doctor, I asked for BOTOX injections, not BUTTOCKS injections.'