Plant Professor Gifts

"Before invasive species, the only things I could grow were weeds and mildew."

'Whenever he stares out the window like that I know he's about to go into a gardening frenzy.'

Genetic modification creating plastic from plant cellulose.

The University Cricket Match - a sketch at Lord's.

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

Plant Reference Library - Flowers/Trees.

The Velvet Mesquite

"Citizen Kane first draft... Citizen Kane By Orson Welles & Herman J. Mankiewicz Int. Kane's bedroom Kane's old voice Call a freaking ambulance! Rosebud..."

"The meeting was canceled after an outbreak of contagious yawning!"

Lucky Stars.

"Okay, you got this! Who introduced the theory of punctuated equilibrium?"

Looking for Impeachable Offenses in All The Wrong Places

"Remember that half-dead sansevieria you put out on the balcony back in January of 1994, pal?"

'Yes, I love you, but my family would disown me if I cross-pollinated with a weed, so our relationship must end.'

Tree Identification Field Guide...

"Mission 66.666% accomplished."

'Barbarians at the gate? That's fine, I fully support social mobility.'

Conservatives' Golden Economic Legacy

Assad chemical weapons use.

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

Donald Trump and US Democracy

'This species of fungi was last spotted in Oxford by Alice Liddell in 1862!'

History Department: 'I used to be a revisionist myself, you know!'

"Maybe Earth's primordial soup did contain polyester."

Psychology Dept. Faculty Evaluations Today. I can't tell if it's my id or my ego, but I'm really craving a promotion.

To Iraq with love.

Russian Bear Left Along in the Cold

"Professor Williams had at first been reluctant to join the Assistant Deans in their Think Great Thoughts aerobics. He later came to enjoy the activity."

Academic Affairs: The Chair of Philosophy Corners the Chair of the Sciences

Saguaro Cacti.

Academics at the Beach: Professor Wilson receives his email messages by the use of willpower alone.

U.S. Presidential Monuments.

Martin Luther King Day

"My teacher says you're a threat to regional stability!"