Plant Parent With A Playful Side Pillows

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"Look Mommy, hat!"

Allotment

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

'She's just great with the children.'

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

"I'm losing my patience with you."

"Werewolves of London..."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

"Boy, do we hate to see this... I'm afraid your child's entire body is an 'innie'."

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'

Baby tells other Baby to call.

NYer uploaded by mod - "Come look, hon! We just got a new cactus!"

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Care to gaze upon the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

"Takes the food right out of your mouth."

"Stop blaming yourself. You loved, and dedicated so much of your time. Have you considered getting another cactus?"