Planetary Philosopher T-Shirts

'Could you speak up a little? - I've got six billion of the little twerps buzzing in my ears!'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

Coronavirus

"When I was your age, we wished on stars. Now, we wish on satellites!"

"We've all said things about heliocentricity that look bad when taken out of context."

'God?' Earth receives its first transmission from space.

Questions

"Shall we put it in play?"

"What, then, is theorigin of cosmology? Some say it has always been with us and always will be. Some think it arrived spontaneously, while others feel it started very small and is expanding..."

'Curiosity' discovers Mars was at one time like earth.

'Look at him out there... so cold, so distant. Why do I always fall for the bad boys?'

Eviction Notice for Earth...

"Let us recall the parable of Jesus turning the other tentacle."

'The big bang theory of creation.'

Religion & Economics.

"Kind of makes you realize how insignificant my awesome beard is."

"Since I got out here, it seems my mind is like it's in a vacuum."

'let's work with what we've got -- take a few of the more promising apes, and add some extra memory.'

Crouching God Hidden Buddha

Planets in solar system form a New World Order.

Expanding Sun engulfs Planets

'I know just how you feel. Sometimes I think I'm living on the wrong planet too.'

"...and at the edge of the universe it says 'Abandon hope, all ye who look beyond here'."

'If the Sun doesn't explode in five billion years, do you realize how foolish we'll look?'

"Wow, it almost makes me feel as insignificant as an unpaid internship."

'Looking into the vastness of space makes me realize how insignificant you are.'

Time-Space Convergence Ahead

'It's so beautiful, yet fragile. Safe, yet vulnerable. More precious than any star in the heavens.'

"Emotionally, I'm checking three bags."