Planetary Caretaker T-Shirts

"I have the whole universe to look after, so I'm putting you in charge of this planet."

"Foster failure"

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

'New Age Dog Park' Dogs commune with Nature.

Father

'They sure have small litters.'

'Hon, can you fill the dog's water dish?'

With Wally the hermit crab showing no signs of life, Shirley yields to her kids' pleas and performs mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

Dog Food

Tortoise polishing his shell

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

Egg Buggy

Child walking with balloon which represents global warming.

'Where did the little bird go?'

Whale-to-whale resuscitation

Dog wearing a cone around his waist: 'Hemorrhoids.'

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

"Oh, Irwin, I wish to god you'd get rid of that thing!"

"Your dinner's on the table and yours is under the table."

Horse Clean-up

"Yes, it is a beautiful day but what makes you think you can go outside and play?"

"Tom, did you forget to feed the pets tonight?"

"I'm afraid the diagnosis isn't good."

EARTH DAY. Whatever.

"Careful, Len. You'll spook the herd."

'In ancient Egypt, cats were treated like gods and in this house, it's pretty much the same: Come in friend...'

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

Meals on Wheels/Wheelie Bins

"We're baitfish - we'll always be endangered."

'Do human beings get ear mites, Doctor?'

Succeed.

Worm Appreciation Society!

"Your test results are in. You've got Irritable Growl Syndrome."

'Go ahead, open it. It's a ball.'

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."