Pillow Talk Prankster Gifts

'You remind me of my husband - He's hopeless in bed too!'

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

"There's a conversation to be had around a piece of work I'd like us to do tonight."

"Are you crazy? I can’t tell her that!"

"What do you mean it could've been better?"

"He's got SUCH greasy hair, and dandruff like you wouldn't believe!"

"Now can I be in one of your comics?"

"Honey, wake up. I had that dream again where I wake up and you get angry at me for waking you up."

"Was it as good for you as it was for me?"

Imaginary boyfriends are best.

"Now give me something intimate to say."

"But in the dream, ha ha, your family was normal, even that sociopath little brother of yours."

'The girls in the office said you were very energetic in bed - the lying bastards!'

"Where do you to go?"

He liked his communication soft and cuddly.

'Yes, it's very nice. But, that isn't what I meant when I asked you to be more creative, in bed.'

'The keepers will be in soon - we better get back to the straw and bamboo.'

"Who's God?"

"I know you love me, I just wish you would take longer showing it."

Lawyer, couple in bed - 'Natalie, remember my mother said we shouldn't go to sleep without settling things...'

"Use your inside voice."

"Next week is out. I'll be in Houston merchandising my pain."

"Mother, you were right."

Sex Score

"Well which do you think is more likely, your pillow is growing hair or you're losing yours?"

"It's the sighs that count."

"How did we do?"

"You're a pig in bed."

Squawk dirty to me...

"Jesus, Mike. Play me or trade me."

"I dreamed my parents were still alive."

'I've never slept with a cartoonist before; will it be funny?'

"Let's explore why you detest my throw pillows."

'Does this bed have a sleep number?'