Photoshop Enthusiast Gifts

Since college admissions officers might see his Facebook page...

'Hire someone with Photoshop experience to make these sales figures look better.'

"No offense, but you look better in Photoshop."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

'Honey, bring the camera, he's standing on one leg!!!'

The Professor was a brilliant botanist but a hopeless photographer.

"Excuse me, but could you ask the chef to make this a little more photogenic?"

Snapshots in Time

Smile

Husband takes photos while wife tries to keep canoe from going over falls.

Mission Impossible: The Family Photo

'Do you mind if I take a few pictures, Bill?

'I'm afraid we had to cancel the Christmas party...but the good news is that the senior partner says you can still come in to photocopy your bottoms.'

"So that's two votes for save and one for delete."

'What do you mean you 'forgot' the camera?!'

"Great photo."

Bunny Pranks

Say cheese!

Lumiere brothers caricature

The statue of Apollo takes a selfie with the Venus de Milo.

'No, go ahead and critique my mss. I'm always ok ... after the initial reaction.'

'Can you redo this manuscript, John, and make it less stupid?'

Some Photography Tips For Your Vacation

"He's a terrific photographer but weddings are not his specialty."

"It's a 'selfie.'"

Social Struggles

The Undeniable Spirit of Tourists

"Well, no wonder you can't think! There's your brain over there on the floor!"

'Nice smile.'

For some reason, whenever they're around me, they get out their phones.

The Press

If Whistler and his mother were alive today.

'He's picture perfect, alright, but the negative leaves a little to be desired.'

"They grow up so fast."