Phone Call Blocker Pillows

'I'll call you back, just on my yacht.'

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

'I'm sick of answering the phone - half the time, it's about business!'

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

'I'm going to have to transfer you to someone I don't like.'

'I could text you...I can fax you...I can email you...I could ring you...Lunch?...I can't make it.'

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

"You're young enough to play tag, but not old enough to borrow my phone to play phone tag."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

'Waiter, there's a cell phone in my soup.'

"Look, you guys call here all the time and we keep telling you - we don't tale telemarketing calls! If you call one more time, I..."

Today Guy came up with the funniest comic of all time. Unfortunately, Rodd suffered a rare attack of the debilitating 'Drawer's Block'.

'Hold on, there might be someone more interesting on the other line...'

Even though I'm on the do-not-call-list telemarketers manage to ruin my hibernation again.

"The secret of time management? Never take anyone off hold."

Houdini 2019

'Are you gonna answer that?'

Throw-Your-Voice Mail.

"Well, I don't think it is your constitutional right to interrupt my dinner with a sales call."

'Stupid telebarketers.'

Death can wait.

'Never fails,,, The second we sit down for dinner,'

"Yethhh, hello. . .are you clothed?"

'I hope you don't want to leave a message - he hates messages.'

'This is the technical support. To become connected to a service agent, please press the root of 576081, divided by three, times one point seven, mins 429.1.'

"Hey, is your refrigerator running?" Jake and Billy make their last prank call.

"Mom! You and dad won't believe this, but right now I'm watching two flies making out on top of a can of soda!!" Dan was really lonely.

"I'm going to put you on hold for a few minutes...to see if you totally lose it."

"I only wish this was the final notice."

Cold-calls.

'Blasted caller ID! I can't get through to anybody!'

'At the sound of the tone, please leave a message.. unless you're trying to sell me something.'

'Phone-b-gone, gets rid of unwanted phones.'

"No, I'm not interested in a free ski weekend. Please take me off your call list."