Philosophical Sages Gifts

Old man talking about how his attitude to politics has changed with age

British savings accounts

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

The older I get, the more introspective I get, or is that retrospective?'

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

Don't you see, Kreutzer? That's why we have all this literature. So you won't duplicate an experiment that's already been done, and there's no reason at all why you should be duplicating Smedly's experiments. After all, he shares a lab with you.

Voltaire

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

Justice

Man can levitate but can't hold fingers properly.

US Tightens The Iraq War Belt

The 11th Commandment

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

Bishop with a crozier case.

Greek Tragedy: 'Yes... we agree to further cuts in government spendings..!!!'

"Time heals all wounds. It also kills every living thing."

'How am I supposed to meditate with your nose whistling?'

God finger

Manspreading in Art

'They say ninety is the new eighty.'

Couldn't you have used a smaller font?

"That was a fascinating regression. Apparently, you were a pirate in a previous life!"

"You're confusing guilt with feelings of remorse. With remorse, you don't need a lawyer."

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

"You know the rules, if you can't pay my fee I shall have to eat you."

'All that we learn from history is that we don't learn from history...'

Just what were you doing in Georgia anyways Hmmm Isn't it true that you were lookin' for a soul to steal Your confession states that you were in a bind cause you were way behind, Care to elaborate, Mr, Seacrest I mean, Lucifer,,

'Your honor, my client only broke into the museum because he had an art attack.'