Pharmacy Humor Fan Gifts

"That's the strongest teeth whitener we carry. Smile in the dark and your mouth becomes a night light."

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

"That new drug causes flatulence."

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

There aren't any serious side effects — just an occasional Elvis sighting.

'The FDA now requires that we have an actor show you what kinds of side effects you might experience.'

Drug vending machines at hospital.

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

Pharmaco. He writes drug side effect warnings. Ah, a health scare provider.

'The $39.95 is for the prescription, sir, and the $7 surcharge is a little something for our handwriting expert.'

Relax, I'm just here to pick up a prescription.

"For the perfect sedative, take the juice from a bottle of whisky..."

Medical Supplies

From now on, the rats that get steroids don't have to run the maze.

"Oh darn, there it is right there: side effects may include squid head."

'You'd better stick with blurry eyes, anxiety attacks and hallucinations, because he drug prescription, I'd give,shows even greater side effects!'

"He thinks he's invented a fluted, or grooved, top for pill bottles so that he can tip out a single pill rather than have a cascade of them rolling about on the kitchen or bathroom floor."

Sea of Tranquillity

'Side effects may include loss of appetite, job, home and family.'

"Do you carry generic placebos?"

"I like my job because I can afford better psychotropic drugs than my colleagues!"

'Don't worry about the side effects. You already suffer from all the side effects caused by this medication.'

'Side effects? You have to worry about side effects?'

"They’re burying him with his Xanax."

We need to up your dosage or lower mine.

"I hope you work out better than my last roommate. He had backaches, dizziness, and an erection that lasted four hours."

Roy felt it was important to act out any side effects that a prescription might cause.

"These have severe side effects but they may not have enough time to bother you."

'It was more of a 'triple blind' test. The patients didn't know which ones were getting the real drug, the doctors didn't know, and, I'm afraid nobody knew.'

"I can't afford to take on any new conditions at this time."

'You can sniff out pet supplies on aisle five.'

'Wait! Tell me again about the 'excessive gas and oily discharge'?'

You say the plumage has lasted longer than four hours?

"No, it's not mentioned in the side effects. But you have noticed that it's a full moon tonight, haven't you?"

"If you feel the hear pounding rush of first love, all your doctor."