Pharmacy Pun Lover Gifts

'Sorry, sir, but that's what your prescription seems to say.'

Prozac- Now In Holiday Strength

"Apparently he's been dealing in drugs for years"

'...and this one's a freebie from the pharmaceutical company that keeps you addicted to your other medications.'

'This is the same prescription that you always refill except that the name has been changes to make it easier to pronounce.'

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Now that's what I call rejection.'

There aren't any serious side effects — just an occasional Elvis sighting.

'I understand you know how to treat a woman.'

Relax, I'm just here to pick up a prescription.

"You're in the "Stone Age." You've got kidney stones, gall stones, and bladder stones."

"We only test our drugs on plants, so we have to do lots and lots of extrapolating."

Medical Supplies

"And that one's for the relief of anxiety caused by the high cost of medication."

'Here is the mood elevating medication that your doctor prescribed. The less costly generic version is called chocolate.'

I heart bypass t-shirt.

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

"Oh darn, there it is right there: side effects may include squid head."

"I'm Dr. Fenton. I'll be performing your microsurgery today."

'Side effects may include loss of appetite, job, home and family.'

'The lab report just came in. The lab is in fine shape!'

'I ordered an IV, not an ivy.'

'You're getting a stye.'

Hospital. Patient to stomach specialist: 'What's your gut-feeling, Doctor?'

"It appears you have medication forgetfulness disorder, which, as you can imagine, is untreatable."

"Those giblets are gonna have to come out."

'This is our most efficient inhibition blocker. It's 99% alcohol.'

Roy felt it was important to act out any side effects that a prescription might cause.

Plastic Surgery

'Don't worry about the side effects. You already suffer from all the side effects caused by this medication.'

We need to up your dosage or lower mine.

'You can see the Doctor now. Don't ask him anything too medical.'

"I can't afford to take on any new conditions at this time."

'You can sniff out pet supplies on aisle five.'