Petal Perfectionist T-Shirts

'Tch... why does Amanda always have to go that one step further?'

'You and I are going to have a long talk when I get you home.'

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

'Quick, press control Z!'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'I think you've put that in the wrong place.'

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Perfection

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

'Oh, sure, it gets the creative juices going, but is it worth the cost?'

Dispose of unproductive fruit trees.

"It's called being preemptive."

"This painting will make you so famous that you won't be able to walk down the street without being recognised."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Sleeping on the Job

"You're welcome."

'this is the only place where no one is fooling around with the genes.'

'This pea is the first vegetable that I've ever grown so I would like to have it stuffed and mounted.'

Social lens of the photojournalist

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"Quit moving"

Wanting his picnic with Gwen to be perfect, Hal made sure they would not be bothered by ants.

Secateurs/Non-Secateurs.

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

"Come on, we're late. Your crosshatching looks fine."

Great Painting

'Apparently he only uses fugitive colours.'

"Don't make me look fat!"

"He hasn't the heart to discharge her. She's been with him for years."

"Dang it, my eyes were closed - take another one!"