Pet Punters Gifts

"I brought my wife a mink for her birthday, but she refuses to clean out its cage."

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Dog Walker

Pet Cemetery.

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

'No, I don't need a doggy bag, but how about a kitty bag?'

'That was nice of them to order us a new scratching post!'

A dog reads a newspaper

'He's not big enough to use the toilet yet.'

Jerry had a difficult time coming up with cartoon ideas over the noise his dogs made. '...so then the cat says, 'No, thanks. I'll clean it myself.' 'Ha,ha! Yeah, that's a good one,Phil!'

Licker Store

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

"Not too much off my back."

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

"Miss Sadie did remember several pets in her will."

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

Headstone in bird cage, "We really loved our budgie.."

'They're for a friend.'

Saloon Selectives

'If provoked - his remarks can be scathing.'

". . . But, according to your cat, you had a fur ball contract."

"Jack Russell?"

"Must dash - I'm appearing in a 'restaurant soup' cartoon this afternoon..."

"He's a shiitake."

'Not all my kids went to the dogs...some of them went to the cats.'

'Do you think it takes 10p?'

Dolphin at bar - 'I'm in disguise'

Looking for a cool cat.

"Find another place to dump that crap. This stall is occupied."

"Remember the good ol' days when the house was earning more than the two of us?"

'He kept saying that, 'my bark was worse than my bite', so I bit him!'

-You seem certain he'll win the second race! -Yes, because he's in the FIRST race!

'Look, I don't know what repulsive smelly thing I just ate, but I know what I like.'

"You got off easy. They put me under house arrest."

'Trampoline...pogo stick...got any other genius ideas?'