Pet Owner Surprised By Reality Pillows

"It isn't quite how I pictured it, either."

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

'Could we go in ahead of you? His tranquilizer is wearing off.'

'This won't take long, nurse. This is the dog that got my best friend last summer.'

Animals have broken into (and out of) Norm's home through window.

'My wife and I can't have dogs!'

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

Boy throws a stick for a tortoise. By the time the tortoise returns, the boy is an old man.

"Who wants to go for walkies?"

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

"He was a sea rescue."

'Heel! HEEL! Bad potato!'

'You know that's not what I meant when I asked you to take the dog out!'

101 uses of a dead cat: chariot wheels.

'What! No garnish or side salad?'

'That's the worst case of fleas I've ever seen...!'

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.

'This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you!'

If you want full cover for your cat I suggest you take out the nine lives policy.

An advantage of robotic pets.

The Curse of the Werewolf

'I told you it was a stupid idea getting a pet lemming.'

Handicapped Accessible Hydrant

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

"You're right, you DO smell like a wiener!"

"My name is Sparky, and it's been 7 months since I sniffed another dogs butt..."

"If she can find all the bones she's buried, she's my next investment counselor."

That bird really gives me the creeps...