Pet Owner Comedian Gifts

'Like I was saying, Angus, I'm the master, you're the dog.'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

Dog Dressed to Eat

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

Dogs life

Cats at private view

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

Dog fetching clown shoes.

'Out, damned Spot.'

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

I know, it's so hard not to laugh every time that kid crawls by wearing just a poop bag.

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

Clown walks balloon dog

"His name's Bond. Mittens Bond."

Flowers? My girl prefers a dead mouse!

Mouse on an Exercise Bike

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'