Pet Mess Wrangler Gifts

"Honey, did you finish giving Fluffy her pill?"

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

'Don't worry. I'm using carpet shampoo.'

Baby with straw to eat out of bib.

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

A child and his dog

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

Flies up the ante!

'That beagle sure is a tough case!'

"I work out of my house filled with kids and pets. My hobby is trying to keep sane."

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

Show Jumping Tantrums

Naughty Puppy Dog.

'I can grant you 3 wishes as long as none of them are about getting up on the furniture.'

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

"Ya, that's right. Blame the help."

'Now, you'd better pick up your toys or no bath!'

'Oh, yes, you will get off!'

"As I see it, the issue with dog-walking services is that the pace is dictated by whoever is slowest..."

Coping during the 6 weeks school holidays.

"How may times do I have to tell you to flush? Gosh, will I ever get you potty trained?!"

"Can we forget about our dainty little tracks in the snow for five seconds and try to concentrate on what we're out here for?"

'Of course I'm not mad. What makes you think I'm mad?!'

Adult Education Evening Class: How to sort your rubbish.

Kangaroo to upside down joey: 'Once again your room is in total disarray!'

"Year, pets do teach kids about responsibility. When they won't get off their butts, they know I'll be responsible."

Skin Deep. Hey, that's my dermatologist! He must be doing pretty well! One man's rash is another man's pleasure!

'Don't forget to wipe your feet.'

Heel! Toe!

'They're herding you all over the field! Start playing defense...'

'It IS an interesting hat isn't it? I made it from the skin of the last dog that fouled my mooring ropes!'