Pet Food Evaluator Gifts

-'God that looks disgusting.' -'You're telling me.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

'Oh come on! I can't be that bad!'

Pet Entertainers

'Try the steak tartare...it's okay.'

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"They can put dogs in space, but they can't make decent tasting dog food."

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

"'Market Price' isn't about the food. It's what we think we can charge YOU."

Four Star Meal

"Invisible fences, voiced activated pet doors, automatic pet dispensers, how's an old dog supposed to keep up with all this new technology."

'David discovered that the New & Improved Dog Food was more New & Improved than his New & Improved Canned Soup.'

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

'He's judging our reserve pinot noir - five years to produce it, five seconds in his mouth.'

"So, what's it to be, chicken unfit for human consumption, or beef unfit for human consumption?"

'You're lucky you can't read.'

'He has been asked to review a new dog treat ... '

"It's the first edition of 'How dogs know what their owners are bringing home for dinner'."

John envied his friends who worked at the local chocolate company

"This is our new product consultant."

Cultivated Meat Pet Food Lab

'I hope you're not selling something. Rex doesn't like salespeople.'

You tell me how they know it has new and improved flavour!

"I know it's pricey, but I think going back to the old food is probably a good

'Look at this: We get the gourmet tins while Rex gets the generic dog food...'

"Face it, Earl. We're dogfoodboys."

"Did you hear that?! That reporter just said the same ingredients in artificial meat is is found in pet foods!"

"Not only do these new treats taste like table scraps, they're also good for you."

Coonhound Inc. Petfoods Research & Development