Pet Celebrity Handler Gifts

"Winning so many awards is great. The only downside is the puparazzi."

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

Pushy Dog

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

When Dogs Appear To Be Thinking.

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

I think you started off sending him the wrong message when you named him Alpha.

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

"Well, if it wasn't you who meowed, and it certainly wasn't me who meowed...then...who...meowed?"

"Listen, buddy, a lot of dogs accidentally wee-wee at Westminster."

"I lost my way and wandered through this white hell for five days before your brave rescue dog found me and saved me from starving to death!"

'Did you read my email about Timmy falling down the well?'

'I wish I could do Search and Rescue too: When you're a Police Dog, the people you find don't actually want to be found...'

'Damn showdog people!'

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

He Did It!

"He loves to give autographs!"

"Yeah, but it doesn't smell like a bomb!"

Broken artefact in the museum

"The line in the script was actually 'Woof woof,' but, when we started shooting, 'Bow wow' came out, and the rest is history."

Suddenly Harry regrets ever using anything other than dog treats to motivate his team.

'Best guard dog we've ever had!'

'What did I tell you about feeding your pet beaver table scraps?'

"Barking's what I do, it's not who I am."

'Time out!... Scooper!!'

"Two dozen items have been stolen from this department. I'm appealing for new leads."

"Hon, did you order Alpine?"

Don't forget to feed the python...

'We're like the canine unit, only tougher. Instead of dogs we use big, bad wolves.'

"Leave the toilet."

"They're always in the last place you look."

"Guess what I learned in band class today?"