Pet Adoption Gifts

"There is no air conditioning in the luggage compartment so stand up straight and stop licking your nose!"

'Senior Cat Warranty, Low maintenance sofa accessory, Unlimited purring and cuddling, Mellow 'been there done that' attitude.'

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

Woman pins up a Lost Cat poster on a telegraph pole, but the cat is hiding from her behind the pole.

'The faces have changed a bit, but everyone smells exactly the same.'

Tourists and their Pets.

"Shh. He doesn't know he's adopted yet."

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

"I see a couch."

"Just think, if I keep him we'll never have leftovers again."

"Why wasn't I adopted by a middle-class family in the suburbs?"

'Yes, you were abandoned. But then I adopted you. Why are you still taking it out on my couch?'

"Dude! Have you no shame?"

A woman with a dog and a baby on a leash

"Adopt me."

"When Sam came into my life, she was a cat at risk."

A No-Nonsense Guy with His No-Nonsense Wife and Their No-Nonsense Dog

"I finally found a dog that fits my lifestyle."

"Sometimes I wonder who 'rescued' whom?"

"She has these fantasies that she ‘rescued’ me, and I just let her believe it."

"We should get a dog."

"I was just trying to be nice when I said their min-pin was cute and that I wanted one. It didn't mean anything."

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

"He's a rescue, and before that he was in Vaudeville."

"Seriously? 'Stalin'? That's what you want to name him?"

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

"What the? ... Where’d the? ... How’d ya? ... Get down here!"

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

"Remember that time when Mama said, ‘It’s either me or that dog’?"

Penny

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

"We should get together sometime and pee on things."

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."