Pest Vigilante Pillows

'Steve hates getting ticks.'

'... and bless all of God's creatures with the possible exception of the greenfly...'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

'Well, Mr. 'I don't need any sunblock', what have you got to say for yourself now?'

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

The new global mantra flag for the future

About 40% of the nation's coronavirus deaths could have been prevented...

You can relax now.

"Beware of God"

Johnson allows the Delta variant to run wild in Britain

Save the termites.

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

Guns won't help

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

'Sleep tight - don't let the bedbugs bite!'

Wrong ways to wear a face mask.

Ebola Clinic

'There's a gleam in his eye!'

Collapse of 'Corner Men'

'Well doctor, is it serious?'

Omicron: "Viva 2022!"

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I wish I had emotions like people do. I wish I could think as logically as people do. I'd like to take a walk along the shoreline without rusting. Storing energy in a battery rather than a pot belly would be nice. Having a sense of humor would be fun. The ability to selectively delete memories would be great to have. I wish I didn't have to worry about digital viruses. I wish I didn't have to worry about biological viruses.

Fair readers, please accept these personal tips for remaining healthy and germ free. Public service announcement! Keep your stress low. Exercise, eat right, hydrate and try to get a little affection in your life, if you get my meaning. If you use someone else's computer, wipe down the keyboard with alcohol to kill the germs. Ditto with the mouthpiece of a borrowed cellular phone. Don't touch anything or anyone. Bathe yourself in hand sanitizer. Don't leave the house, and if you do, don't inhale

"I do wish they'd hurry up with that vaccine, so I can get back to worrying about dying of something else."

'I've brought my attorney along to read the small print.'

Dream Advertisements.

Swine Flu danger as a pandemic

A footballer is having an eye test.

A woman has mini scarecrows in here flower garden.

"Relax, it's not the killer-virus. It's 'Saturday Night Fever' so he'll be 'stayin' alive'."

Keep out - Covid-19

A knight fights the Covid-19 virus.