Pest Humorist Pillows

A Mouse hole in the shape of Arabian architecture

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"Houston, we have a problem."

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

'Luxury cruise you said!'

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Fish with a human in a bowl.

Dogs life

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

Cats at private view

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'Out, damned Spot.'

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

"There's only the four of us. I hope you like doo-wop."

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Some days, we all just feel like a little take-out lo mein.

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

Clown walks balloon dog

'It was this big. I swear'

"His name's Bond. Mittens Bond."

Flowers? My girl prefers a dead mouse!

Mouse on an Exercise Bike

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'