Pet Humorist Pillows

"I bit someone once. It tasted like chicken."

Have you seen this laser dot?

"He's a bird-dog."

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

"Oh no! The dog's eaten the Thesaurus"

"Sometimes I get a craving for sushi."

"You're positive no one will be able to tell the difference?"

Doctor on call - "Oh and while you're here can you take a look at the cat?"

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

'I don't know where he's getting it from, but it happens every time I ask him to fetch my slippers.'

"Isn't it true that the prosecution offered you a bone to testify?"

"Hang on a minute...That's not regular fish food...That's ECZEMA!"

'Out, damned Spot.'

'Cat food' is mice

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Behavior Modification.

'Innocent' cat eating mouse.

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Cat News.

Cat Food Not Tested On Animals

'She taught me that copping an attitude will get you everything.'

"I started out fetching."

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

'Do you have any identification other than the collar?'

Welcome to the Society of Veterinarians Who Have Spayed Tomcats!'

'They're all for you.'

"If it would help I could eat the store-brand dog food."

My budgie likes Mars bars.

Cat Sisyphus

Fish with a human in a bowl.

'How stupid dogs are for chasing after a bone.'

'I think the temperature's a bit low in the Terrarium!'

"They say I get 152 channels."

A clown walks into his living room and sees a balloon animal scratching up the furniture

'I hate to complain, but papering my cage with computer printouts just isn't the same as good old newspapers.'