Pessimism Pundit Gifts

"Look, a shooting star- let's critique it!"

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

'With all the stresses and worries out there, happy hour no longer seemed to work.'

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

Arthur Schopenhauer

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Untold Love Stories. The Shadow and Pollyanna. It's no use, Lamont, you know what evil lurks in the hearts of men and I believe there's good in everybody.

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

Pessimists v Optimists.

"Show me a man who's optimistic about the human race..."

Platitudes for the hopelessly realistic. When life gives you lemons, get a gift receipt.

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"A pessimist thinks that we've already arrived."

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"Half Empty. Half Empty. Half Empty-"

'There, Mr Optimist. Now how full is it?'

'I make certain all my clients are pessimists...they don't expect to win.'

Tom's last day.

"Look on the dark side."

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"Everything in your life has gone smoothly. That's a violation of Murphy's law."

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

The End is Near art gallery opening.

'Some see the glass as half empty, some see it as half full -- I see it as taxable!'

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

Follow England mate, they're always crap!

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

"Die alone"

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

"Maybe you should be depressed, your life isn't that great."

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

'Taking guard' 'The pessimist'

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'