Perfume Sales Assistant T-Shirts

"This one might suit you. It's called Oldie But Goodie."

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

'Have you no common scents?!'

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

'Does this perfume have an antidote?'

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

Pheromones.

'This scent goes well with a diamond necklace.'

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

'Bradley is a strict vegetarian. Do you have broccoli flavored lipstick?'

'Drive 'em wild with the sweet scent of net profits exceeding forecasts due to higher gross margins and cost-cutting.'

'Maybe the stuff stinks.'

'..Can I interest you in our new fragrance - 'Are''

Excess

"You get your money back if your don't get laid in seven days."

'That bacon sarnie fragrance gets them every time!'

"Yes, it was tested on rabbits and they simply adored it."

"May I say that's a lovely combination of cyclomethicone, triisostearin, and propylene carbonate you're wearing today, Dr. Thomas!"

'My husband is all work and no play. Do you have anything that smells like an office?'

'Have you got something that says, 'I've got a headache?''

"Whore of Babylon?"

'Do you have a perfume that will make me smell thinner?'

'I'm looking for something that reeks moderation and restraint.'

"Honey, they just can't resist it."

"I'm due in court today. Do you have anything that smells like community service?""

'I need a new scent.'

'Now, this one gets about a hundred males to the gallon.'

"...And it has a pheromone which will make him submissive to you."

'Have you got one with smaller spots?'

"Yes, but it's naturally toxic."

'Have you got something that smells like a skateboard?'

'Not sure if that comes in your size. Let's see if I can find someone who cares.'

Indian brave buys warpaint from Avon lady.

'He will love this cologne. It smells like an undervalued stock.'