Penfriend Pillows

"Apparently she's your Philippino penfriend come to visit"

'I told you to invite a friend over.'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

"Be or be not. There is no question."

'That's the last time I ask you to tie my shoe laces!'

The novel was printed and in the stores ... any minute now, the world would beat down his door.

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

Deadlines, kill fees. Who comes up with these terms?

"Are you still mad at me?" "Mentally I'm storming off right now."

"Can I borrow a pen?"

List making as therapy.

"My dad didn't get what he wanted for Christmas, so he went into his usual rage-display! So embarrassing..."

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

'No problem...'

Mourning Pens

Dude you're dating, ideal boyfriend, his dog

'This dingo penpal of his - they're Australian aren't they?'

Dear Bertha - I'd write more often, but I always seem to be out of ink! Love, Oggy

Barking Today - 'I always bark for no reason whatever.'

I'm interviewing for a new walker.

"Dude! I'm writing a letter to my parents. How many N's in money?"

'Are you still sure the pen is mightier than the sword?'

Francois Mauriac.

'Pen no write.'

'Where's that wet dog smell coming from?

MAIL CALL AT THOMPSON, HALVERSON, SPIELMAN & OSGOOD

"Do those shoes taste funny to you?"

Writing a letter

Postman

The End Of My Pen's Ink Supply Is Nea

'I work on the latest tablet, but deep down I'm still a ball point pen and yellow legal pad guy.'

Paper airplanes drop pen nibs

'You're lucky: I can't have a penpal 'cause we don't have a fixed address...'

Be a pen pal and make someone's day.

"Isn't this more fun than those old briefs and contracts and things?"