Pen-to-paper Philosopher Gifts

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Quality Control

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

Pastorius wonders why.

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

Innovation tray covered in ivy.

"Do you think we should look again at who we invite to these meetings?"

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

Hamlet in the craft shop.

'In my opinion, you're either part of the problem or part of the solution. Unless, of course, you're Jones, who thinks he can just float above it all!'

In, Out, Complain.

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know what your office staff are doing?'

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

'I ink, therefore I am....'

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

Cat and INOUT boxes.

'Does a blog count as being published.'

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'

Desk boxes - sublimeridiculous.

'Actually I only do this on weekends.'

See District Directors

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

'No, the Tower of Babel wasn't built for better phone reception.'

'So much effort to meet me? Man, you just should have visited my website!'

KNITEO ERGO SUM!

"Pot of gold?! Nobody uses cash these days! Do you fancy a couple of gift cards?"

"If you drink eight glasses of water every day, you'll due fully hydrated."

"To give him credit...normally I think these staff 'consultations' are a complete waste of time...but he's been in his office all morning working on our ideas."