Bookish Philosopher Gifts

"Do you have any why-to books?"

How to be self-reflexive

"If these are the happiest days of my life, I haven't got much to look forward to..."

Stephane Mallarme

'Death in the 'life' section of library'

"I've searched, and found what we had before social media."

"You're going to hate yourself."

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

"Feel free to take notes."

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

The dangerous world of the armchair thinker

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

A man on a giant book poses as Rodin's The Thinker.

"I should've never studied canon law."

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

'Hard to follow...'

The Three Kinds of People

"Lemme guess: You're struggling with the French press again."

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

"That's right - 'What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.' You just keep on thinking that..."

"I don't believe in egrets."

'What do you mean 'theoretically'? Everything we do is theoretical.'

'In this world, son, you've got to learn to push yourself.'

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

"Some Debussy, Igor."

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

The Grapes of Wrath finally get some professional help.

Book Worm

"Just when I think things couldn’t get any worse, they replace The Lockhorns with Doonesbury!"

"Would you mind moving to your doggy bed? I'd like to sit in my chair. I know you can hear me. Your book is upside down."