Pawsome Punster Gifts

"You comin' to Duke's blow-out tonight? It's B.Y.O.T. Bring your own toilet..."

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

Another Turning Point in History. Oh, the heck with it -- I'll never get these antlers right. Mickey Moose.

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

Dog Walker

Pet Cemetery.

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

"We'll just have the loaves and fishes. . ."

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

Garden of Eden and scrumping

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

Bitter End

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

A dog reads a newspaper

'Hopefully this will not have a negative impact on my dinner.'

Hamlet.

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

Licker Store

The Poodle and The Twooudle.

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

'Nice try, Billy, but dogma is not a puppy's mother!'

"It's obvious Jesus accepts everyone. His disciples were fishermen, and we know what kind of lies we tell."

"Behold the geometry of pizza: square, circle and triangle."

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

'Play dead.'

Surfin' the web.