Pattern Disruptor Gifts

Spoonfest

"Here's what you wanted – a strategy to live abundantly, build capital, surpass your peers and disappoint your heirs."

"Move, Gary."

'before you say 'all this will be yours', I don't want it.'

'We've got trouble, Henderson - Your people got with my people and decided they didn't need us.'

GAP. GAP. NO GAP.

'She wishes.'

"You must be the new guy!"

"Pawn to King Four."

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz - 'How did my life get this dull?'

"I've decided to give up my day to day responsibilities."

'They tried to GAG her but they can NEVER stop her 'dance of neglect on the ward'!'

"Look! It came pre-defaced by the artist."

A man exits his house to a clapboard.

'I didn't know I was going to sneeze.'

"How about one-ish? I love the way it sounds."

"I started up a startup to start up more startups."

A dictator makes a speech, about to be doused with water.

Master dog trainer.

Occupy crunch

'Ssshh! You're disturbing the class.'

'Miss Jones, those pants have got to go. I can't have my secretary looking like a boy.'

An angry engineer getting out of a train that has had to stop because a woman has taken some railroad ties out to build a flower garden in the middle of the tracks.

"That's the first time he's ever done anything spontaneous!"

TV Kill

do you like democrats of republicans? is that the only choice?

'Would you mind jumping in further down please?'

'We'd like to share a haircut.'