Patio Party Host Gifts

Aprons

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

'Ron's not drunk - he's pouting because we won't play Pictionary.'

"Someone's sending us a tweet...it says 'more seed, please!'"

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

"The parasol certainly paid for itself this summer."

Pyjamas - Party, Sleep and Dawn Raid.

"We're not laughing at you, sweetie. We're laughing at something you don't understand."

"It's a cookout-act stupid!"

An angry barbecue.

Mini Bar

We practically live out here in the summer.

"Who like 'em well done?"

'See I told you the garden was big enough for a table and chairs.'

"Son, I've asked Mr. Puffer to instruct you on the finer points of classical as your new tooter."

'He's been shot!'

Acupuncturist Society Cocktail Party - 'For heaven's sake, Brian, it's only a pineapple chunk!'

"Isn't it about time to switch from your warm-weather chair to your cold-weather chair?"

A family gets ready for their microwave meal on the patio.

"I find a good cabernet is the best way to put my money where my mouth is."

'You spend too much time in this stuffy pub.' 'I'll go out onto the patio.'

A Good Year.

Please Leave by 9

"Yeah, Charlie wnet to one of those 'mindful outdoor experience' seminars. . ."

'Dear, of course no one can tell you what they think of the wine, you haven't told them how much it cost yet.'

'This is the worst wine I've ever tasted--I'll take 20 cases.'

Lawn Furniture/Yawn Furniture.

"Actually, we're not a snow sculpture. Just been waiting for table service since September."

"Fetus?"