Particle Physics Fan Gifts

"I'm tired of being an electron."

Why Physics and Politics Don't Mix

'You look as though you've been dragged through a Large Hadron Collider backwards.'

'Run! I've discovered the Higgs Bison.'

'It started with just the particles being accelerated, but now everything around here has speeded up.'

'It's down. The particles are supposed to collide with other particles, not with the physicists.'

"I'm a gas!"

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

"Is it that bad?"

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

"Papi, will you play build-a-model-rocket-so-we-can-calculate-acceleration-rates-and-thrust-levels-for-maximum-payload with me? Please?!"

Science Fair Judgements

Sir Isaac Newton wondered how he couldexplain this! (Pineapple)

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

"Have you tried turning it on and off again..?"

Free Radicals.

Entropy.

"Uniformly accelerated motion"

Space Pioneer

The Soundness of Newton's Laws

Newton Discovers Gravity

'So much for Newton. Now, as for Einstein...'

"Time passes much more slowly in the other dimension, so take these sudokus."

Science And Society 1923

Galileo's Attempt to discover is heavier dog falls faster than lighter dog.

Friends often dropped by and subjected Sir Isaac to a little good-natured ridicule.

'I've got an amoeba here who wants to go to Officer's Candidate School.'

'We've proven without a doubt, that this particle has a negative charge. Unfortunately, an accelerator in Switzerland has proven, without a doubt, that it has a positive charge.'

"'Why is the speed of light considered a universal constant?'"

Professor Biggens instantly regretted putting his head into the particle accelerator...

"You're under arrest for breaking the law of gravity! You have the right to..."

Sir Earnest Rutherford splits the opium.

'Well sure, if you want to get technical about it.'