Parody Pundit Pillows

Queue at Heaven's Gate for 'External Rewards'.

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Genetic modification creating plastic from plant cellulose.

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

"Suppose you tell me why you want to be a faceless drone at Globatron Inc.?"

"Fact amnesty"

'I thought time was supposed to be money!'

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

Voice of the GOP

'Hmmm, the 27th you say... Yes, I'm away that day, so I guess it's OK for you to play...'

"Of course my main concern is how the situation in Eastern Europe will affect the pennant race."

Old soldiers never die. They just become TV pundits.

"In view of climate change, I'd put all my money into ice cream, mineral water and weapons!"

Oval Office

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

'I get to work early and all I get are the worms.'

"The pound is reaching parity with Liz Truss."

"We really need to recognise the significance of climate change..."

"These are my 'Nebraska attack poodles'. They don't bark, they don't bite, they just do exactly what they're told. . ."

"The truth? With all the fake news and alternative facts now, we're all just guessing."

'I made an illegal entry on my computer. What are you in for?'

Don't cash it before next Tuesday.

Sanna Marin party

Boris Johnson Loses

Elvis Trump

Joe Rogan Spotify

Universal Credits Computer: Kaput