Parking Spot Philosopher Pillows

"The end of my favorite series is near."

'I love this street...it's so real man...'

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

Comparing lottery odds with bus punctuality.

One youth says: 'Lamppost, bollard, tarmac, kerb.' Other says: Zebra crossing,traffic hump, postbox.' Caption: Street language

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

'I was hoping you could help me with an implant.'

"Wanna swap?"

'Oh Great. We just missed the once a millennia bus out.'

"I don't miss my accountancy life. I find I get out more nowadays."

'Andrews, a parking space will be assigned to you in a day or two.'

"The good news is, we've managed to secure you a ?7 per week pay increase. The bad news is, we're going to charge ?2 per day to park your cars."

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense. If I had a cell phone, you wouldn't bother me!

Mission Impossible

Bank

Homeless man's sign: 'Sperm donor to the crowned heads of Europe.'

'The problem is I can't tell the difference between a deeply wise, intuitive nudge from the Universe and one of my own bone-headed ideas!'

Parking Yesterday, Parking Tomorrow, But Never Parking Today.

"Make it a gallon and a half. I'm living one day at a time."

"You can't compete with a retired pharmacist."

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

'...if we ain't got homes why should anyone...'

"You love gloating, don't you?"

Sign Reads: Loiter At Your Own Risk.

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

I Spoke Out On The Issues - Please Help.

'Try not to smile, sir. Imagine you're looking for a parking space.'

Homeless Man: 'So...your Park bench or mine?'

"Do you have a minute for a problem whose solution has eluded humanity since the dawn of civilization?"