Park Philosopher Pillows

"You can't compete with a retired pharmacist."

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

"Venal, narcissistic, power hungry politicians. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em."

"Damn it, Wilbur, that's our bench!"

"Being retired is okay, but it takes a while getting used to doing anything UNETHICAL."

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"I'm bored."

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"So, what do you do for play?"

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

"Recess does things to a man."

Men gossiping

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

'Don't let them know you're a prodigy. If they find out, they'll take away your teddy bear.'

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

ONE HORSE TOWN