Parenting Trials Expert Gifts

"Your birth was easy. It's everything after that that's been a pain."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

"That is one absorbent nappy."

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"Ah...here they are!"

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

"How is it gendered?"

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

The modern generation!

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

"Damn it, are we flying a spoonful of peas again?"

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

'The stuka brought you.'

'Is it okay to apologize for something I'm going to do?'

He can't talk yet, but he still gets the last word.

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

'Before we begin, he's the one that's been helping me with my homework.'

Sometimes nature not only calls; she makes an emergency breakthrough.

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

'But I'm not tired yet!!!'

Look at it this way: You're changing the future of the nation...one diaper at a time!

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

'Sorry, he can't come out and play. He's grounded.'

World's Best Dad. I don't know. I thought they were with you. World's Best Mom.

Toilet Training