Parenting Puzzler Pillows

young mother with a baby being bombarded by advice on parenting from older mothers

"I couldn't find a sitter."

'My parents try so hard to do the right things for me, but, unfortunately, they're always wrong.'

'You'll have to excuse Graham, he sees his son as a role model.'

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

A Mix Up Between the Buggy and Lawn Mower.

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

Baby has used blocks to spell out 'SO VERY BORED'.

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

What can I play?

'Honey, what's wrong?! Why are you crying?'

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

'I couldn't practice last night on account of my Dad's head was gonna' explode.'

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

"Wasn't it your turn to drop him to online school?!"

The mating call of the Yellow-Throated Warbler,

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

The relay race

'I know Jesus spoke in parables. Now for the last time, tell me exactly where you put my car keys.'

'My kids don't understand me.'

Oops.

'What a coincidence....that's my mum's name to!'

Bedtime Story

'He was raised by sparrows!'

'That's enough Rusty.'

A Toxic-Waste-Think-Tank With Toxic-Thoughts.

"Is it wrong to be evasive and not answer questions?"

'Looks like Timmy got solitary.'

Planned Parenthood: 'What do you mean, you want an unexpected pregnancy leave?'

'I've done the washing up - Do we have any glue?'

Baby Philosophy.

Ingredients: me

Man emerges from baby changing room, having changed his baby for a crate of beer.

'It's a model to study stress...these mice all have long commutes, dead end jobs and out of control kids.'