Modern Parenting Dilemma Pillows

"Wasn't it your turn to drop him to online school?!"

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

"He just said his first word!"

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

Kid is 'Born to Text'.

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

"I brought frankincense." "I brought gold." "I brought diapers!" "A wise woman!"

'We're beta testing Goo-Goo Glass.'

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

You're right-this is way better than a standing desk.

"Now, Mrs. Stevens, go to work, relax, and leave the social engineering to us."

'I don't care if an app on your phone is monitoring you, you still need a baby sitter when your father and I are gone.'

"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?..."

Phone Mittens

"Santa said to stop making toys. From here on out we'll be making computers and phones. Does anyone know anything about technology?"

'Sending someone to his room was a punishment when I was a kid.'

'He's already surfing without nappies!'

"We're going to start with the birds and the bees and then work our way up to the new reproductive technologies."

'I know Jesus spoke in parables. Now for the last time, tell me exactly where you put my car keys.'

'I'm so glad this bedtime story comes in audio.'

'Jimmy made his first blog post today.'

Big book of memes

"We named him XB32116 so we never forget the Wi-Fi password."

"I was hoping her first sentence would be, 'I love you, mommy.' Not, 'what's the Wi-Fi password?'"

"When the evil witch pushes the children into the oven, .... that's just a metaphor for putting them in the microwave"

'We'd like to christen him 2GR4T7VXS35. That way it'll be easier for him to get his own web domain name when he's older.'